DIVORCE..Denny trio r (11410074)

 “ Divorce “

I. Qur'an verses

وَإِذَا طَلَّقْتُمُ النَّسَاء فَبَلَغْنَ أَجَلَهُنَّ فَأَمْسِكُوهُنَّ بِمَعْرُوفٍ أَوْ سَرِّحُوهُنَّ بِمَعْرُوفٍ وَلاَ تُمْسِكُوهُنَّ ضِرَاراً لَّتَعْتَدُواْ وَمَن يَفْعَلْ ذَلِكَ فَقَدْ ظَلَمَ نَفْسَهُ وَلاَ تَتَّخِذُوَاْ آيَاتِ اللّهِ هُزُواً وَاذْكُرُواْ نِعْمَتَ اللّهِ عَلَيْكُمْ وَمَا أَنزَلَ عَلَيْكُمْ مِّنَ الْكِتَابِ وَالْحِكْمَةِ يَعِظُكُم بِهِ وَاتَّقُواْ اللّهَ وَاعْلَمُواْ أَنَّ اللّهَ بِكُلِّ شَيْءٍ عَلِيم

When ye divorce women, and they fulfil the term of their (`Iddat), either take them back on equitable terms or set them free on equitable terms but do not take them back to injure them, (or) to take undue advantage if any one does that He wrongs his own soul. Do not treat Allah`s Signs as a jest, but solemnly rehearse Allah`s favours on you, and the fact that He sent down to you the Book and Wisdom, for your instruction. And fear Allah and know that Allah is well acquainted with all things. "(QS.Al-Baqarah: 231)

II. Definition

Literally, the definition of divorce is the dissolution of the marriage by religion and law.

According to Spanier and Thompson (1984) divorce is a reaction to the marriage relationship is not going well and is not a disapproval of the institution of marriage, while Ahrons and Rodgers (in Carter & Mc Goldrick, 1981), divorce is a disruption in family life cycle, which can cause deep feelings and loss of family members.

Handoko said (in Anas, 2004) divorce for children is “die sign” for the unity of family, children feel that a half of theirself lost, live will never same again after their parents did divorce. And they must accept sad and feel lost with deeply.

From based on this can conclusion that meaning from dicorce is broken of marriage by law cause the marriage relationship is not going well and is not a disapproval of the institution of marriage, usually, this matter start by conflict between husband and wife, because that can make bad tempered, psychology, environment, and family members, which can cause deep feelings.

III. Psychological development of children of divorce

a. Meaning of Families for Children

For children a family is very important. The family as a place of refuge, gain affection. The role of the family is very important to children's development in the coming period, both psychologically and physically. Without the child's family will feel alone, no place to hide.

b. Children's Psychological Condition Due to Divorce

Time when divorce occurs is a critical period for children, especially the relationship with parents who do not live together. Different feelings going on in the inner children. At this time the child also must begin to adapt to the new changes in his life. Things that are usually perceived by the child when the parents are divorced:

- Feeling insecure (insecurity).

- No unwanted or rejected by the parent who left.

- Angry Sad and lonely.

- Lost, feeling alone, self-blame themselves as the cause of divorced parents.

These feelings can lead to the child, as an adult to be afraid of failure and fear of close relationships with others. Some indicators that a child has to adapt is: Be aware and understand that her parents are no longer together and no longer fantasize for unity of both parents, to accept the loss, not mad at their parents and do not blame yourself, be himself.

IV. Analyze

            There are somecases about divorce, and there are some bad effects cause divorce. For example : for their children, the children will feel that a half of theirself lost, they feel sad. And this is not good for their development. I think there are some points must to attention, this :

-       Divorce is easy solution, but think again, because divorce is not easy like back palm of the hand.

-       Divorce always have bad thinking for society.

-       On of them is cause of divorce, all of the decision of divorce is diceision both of them.

-       Not at all problems can solve by divorce.

-       Childrens are victims of divorce.

Because that some reasons, that divorce have bad effects, so people can think again to not doing divorce.

 V. Case of divorce

ARTISTS DIVORCE: Divorce turns Corbuzier Deddy Since January 31
Friday, March 22, 2013 02:35 PM | | Viewed: 482 Times

Deddy Corbuzier (wikipedia.org)

JAKARTA-Indonesia Another jury Talent Search (IMB) are divorced. Previous Titi Sjuhman had divorced her husband, Wong Aksan, Deddy Corbuzier turn the open-aperture.

Deddy admitted he was three months ago officially divorced from his wife. "I want to tell you that we are divorced. We divorced 31 January, so it's been three months, "he said when met at the Black-and-white Trans7, Pancoran, South Jakarta, Thursday (03/21/2013).

Deddy also admitted that the divorce process goes quickly. "The process is long, more than six months. We divorced in North Jakarta District Court, "he said.

Earlier, in late 2009, Deddy wife, Kalina Oktarani also sued for divorce the father of her child was in the Central Jakarta District Court. Divorce lawsuit registered with registration number 0273/Pdt.g/2009/PN Jkt Pst. By the Plaintiffs on behalf of the defendant Erry Oktarani and on behalf Deddy Cahyadi.

But a few days after that, Kalina revoke lawsuit. They married in 2001. Jibi / Solopos / DTC

References :

http// SOLOPOS.COM   ARTIS CERAI  Deddy Corbuzier Ternyata Cerai Sejak 31 Januari - artis cerai deddy corbuzier cerai mentalis deddy corbuzier.htm

http//Pengertian Perceraian _ PSYCHOLOGYMANIA.htm

http//5 Fakta tentang Perceraian yang Perlu Diperhatikan _ Psikologi Zone - Portal Berita Psikologi Indonesia.htm